The Hidden Cost of Freedom — A Walk, a Talk, and a Realization

 I took a walk with another friend — someone incredibly sharp when it comes to AI and emerging technologies. Our conversation wasn’t planned, but it quickly turned into one of those rare, spontaneous moments of clarity.

We touched on the topic of freedom — especially the kind many people associate with becoming self-employed. You know the dream: “If I just start my own thing, I’ll finally be free.”

And yes, that dream holds true. But it’s only one side of the coin.

The other side?

Discipline. Responsibility. Self-leadership.

Without those, there is no true freedom — just chaos disguised as autonomy.

The Freedom Most People Miss

The freedom we crave isn’t just about waking up whenever we want or working from the beach. It’s about owning our time and having the self-discipline to follow through on our own goals without anyone holding us accountable.

That’s the paradox.

Freedom demands responsibility.

You must create your own structure and still get things done — because you’re no longer reporting to someone else.

You are reporting to your future self and to the life that you want.

The Cost of Ideal Life (COIL)

That’s when I asked him a question that I often ask people stuck in indecision:

“What is your COIL?”

Your Cost of Ideal Life.

Most people have never thought of it this way. They say, “I want freedom. I want to travel. I want to be my own boss.” But what does that actually cost?

What does your ideal day look like?

How much would it realistically cost to live that life — not just survive, but thrive?

For my friend, he guessed his COIL would be around 50,000 SEK/month once he has kids.

There’s no right or wrong answer.

I know people who earn 300,000/month and are happiest spending just 15,000/month.

And others who dream of estates and private chefs.

The point isn’t the number — it’s the conscious clarity around it.

Have you set up your COIL? That will make the process much more smoother, because when you have an aiming point that’s also when you set the right focus and attention.

Part 2:

Productivity, Projects & Direction

Later, he shared something more personal. He’s currently juggling multiple projects and was uncertain about which one to commit to. 

Sometimes you might ask yourself or someone else:

“What do you think I should focus on?”

I told him what I always tell people:

“I can’t give you the answer. But I can help you find it.”

I asked him,

“Which project would give you the most return right now — financially, energetically, or strategically?”

Sometimes we need a catalyst, a quick win. Other times, we need long-term consistency. There’s a time for both. What matters is being self-aware enough to know which season you’re in.

The Myth of “Just One Thing”

I know the common advice:

“Focus on one thing. Don’t spread yourself too thin.”

And yes, focus is powerful.

You can’t fill 10 glasses halfway and expect to remove everyone’s thirst.

But here’s the nuance:

If you’re self-employed, you already juggle many roles — from marketing to delivery to admin to strategy.

Like a chef who prepares multiple dishes at once, you might thrive in a multi-project ecosystem — as long as everything aligns with your vision.

What’s dangerous isn’t juggling — it’s chasing shiny objects with no clear intention.

Sometimes, committing to just one thing at a time can actually work against you. It can lead to boredom, lack of stimulation, or even creative burnout.

Take this example: you could write a book in a year by consistently writing for just one hour a day—that’s 365 hours spread out. But you can’t write a book in one single 365-hour session. Some projects are meant to unfold alongside others, not in isolation. The key is self-awareness—knowing when variety helps you stay engaged and effective.

Balance = Movement That Matters

The key question isn’t:

“Am I doing too many things?”

But rather:

“Which of these things actually moves the needle?”

Sometimes the answer is one project.

Sometimes it’s a combo of three.

As long as each piece feeds your bigger vision — and doesn’t pull you away from it — you’re not distracted. You’re evolving.

At the end it comes down to: What consistent act can I do over time rather than locking in for the short term.

Consistency>>> more effort and focus in the short term.

Most people enjoy good dental health simply because they brush for two minutes every morning and evening. It’s a small habit—but skip it consistently, and problems will follow. The same principle applies to your work. Your future self will thank you for the 15 minutes you invest each day in that long-term project you care about.

Micro-Movements Lead to Macro-Results

You don’t need to go all in to get started.

You can write a book by dedicating 15 minutes a day.

You can build a second income stream by committing one hour a week.

You can become someone entirely new — slowly, quietly, consistently.

We often underestimate what we can do over 2–5 years — and wildly overestimate what we can do in 2 weeks.

Final Words

Your freedom is not just found in escape.

It’s built in the daily alignment with your vision — and the micro-decisions that honor it.

Ask yourself:

✨ What is my COIL?

✨ What project feels most aligned with where I’m going — not just what’s shiny today?

✨ What can I do consistently — even in small doses — that would change everything over time?

You don’t have to do it all.

But you do have to begin.

written by Coach Sanna 🌿